How Do Emirati Families Cope with Death in the Family - Research Paper Example

How Emirati families cope with death in the family Name Institution Date Abstract Family relationships are regarded as the longest and strongest relationships all through the life of a person. The loss of a family member is typically a loss of a significant and stable figure in the family system. The death of a family member can greatly influence Emirati family dynamics through altering the family structure and generating the need for the members of the family to reorganize. The death of a family member can greatly impact the life of the surviving family members. A family that is functioning well, which is often distinguished by open communication, unity amongst members of the family and expression of thoughts and feelings, enhances adaptive adjustments following death of a family member. Surviving members might experience trauma following the loss a member and they usually go through a continuing emotional attachment with the lost member. Introduction Taking care of a member of a family with a progressive and serious illness is generally distressing. The experience creates nervousness and can cause alterations in family dynamics. The entire family is often indirectly or directly engaged in the care procedure. Taking care of an ill individual, particularly at a home setting entails numerous practical duties of ensuring the comfort of both emotional and physical wellbeing of the patient. This research is important because family experiences and conflict during care of the sick family member until they depart might affect the process of grieving of caregivers in the family. Grief, which is an anticipated and natural reaction to the bereavement of a loved member, is a family as well as an individual experience. Death of a family member can influence the dynamics and functioning of the family since the family is an integrated scheme of relationship, and death of a single member makes the system to change forever, requiring members to reorganize and construct enduring bonds with the deceased. Objective This research paper aims at establishing how Emirati families cope with the death of a family member. When a person dies family relationships are destabilized and thus surviving members are required to reorganize themselves and ensure that the family organ remains firm. Literature review A family is an integrated scheme of relationships and death of a family member influences the dynamics and functioning of this system, requiring members to reorganize. Bowlby-West (2000) argues that within the family system, there are characteristics that influence the grieving process of an individual member because individuals vary in the way their express their own grief. The experience of grieving can be impaired or promoted through openness of communication as well as the degree of cohesion amid members of the family. Thus, family functioning during the stage of grieving and particularly during the process of grieving is significant for the psychological welfare of the family members (Murray, 2012). Bowlby-West (2000) argues that if a family is functioning well, communal support amid family members leads to adaptive adjustment or amendment to the loss. Open communication along with expression of thoughts and feelings, family unity and constructive resolution of dissimilarities of views are vital for the functional family that is going through distressing life situations. This is so since when function of a family is greatly restricted, family members find it harder to adapt (Walsh & McGoldrick, 2010). Grieving usually starts with feelings of deadness along with feelings of confusion and unreality. AS the grieving process continues, people slowly create bonds with the deceased. Through sharing memories and recollections of the dead members, families are capable of reconstructing their relationships with the deceased member in their social and inner worlds in a manner that is meaningful to them. The aim of grief is to enhance the bereaved to build a long lasting biography of the dead persons so that they might incorporate their reminiscence into their ongoing lives. This might be attained mainly by conversation with friends, family and even neighbors who knew the deceased (Field, 2010). Giles and Neimeyer (2009) note that dissimilarities in grieving make individual members to feel out of synch. To be in synch, families reframe themselves, implying that they relabel their diversities as strengths other than weaknesses. The family reinvests itself in usual developmental evolution. Open communication is important during relabeling and reframing process. However, this procedure might be slow because every member of the family has limited resources and strong needs after death of a member (Walsh & McGoldrick, 2010). Members of the family who are already highly emotional might not identify the diverse grief style of other members as genuine. Rituals such as religious rites, funerals and family holiday rituals can be utilized to enhance the process of reorganization, recognition and reinvestment within the family (Giles & Neimeyer, 2009). Methodology The research was done to enhance understanding the lived experiences of loss of a family member and the modifications that happen following the death of a family member. The sampled included five males and ten females ranging from twenty two to sixty years old. The study entailed a phenomenological descriptive design, data collection by face to face interviews with the purpose of establishing the subjective experiences of participants following loss of a family member. To recruit prospective participants, there was posting of a flyer around the social conference hall for thirty days. This flyer asked participants about the experience of coping with the death of a family member. This led to attainment of more participants because an interviewee would urge other to take part in the research. Additional participants were found via the word of mouth. The criterion of being included in the research entailed an individual over the age of eighteen years, having gone through the loss of a family member along with completion of an approval or consent form. This method of collecting data was ethical because it included participants who were willing to be interviewed and offer their personal experiences. The participants also signed the consent form as a show of their willingness to talk about their own experiences. There was development of two instruments in the study. First, there was formulation of a short demographic from that requested every participant to offer their present age, religious background, gender, ethnic background and where they were brought up. Secondly, a sequence of quick queries was created to promote elaboration in response to loss of a family member. Data was gathered by completion of the demographic forms along with semi-structured face to face interviewing of the participants. These interviews were audio recorded and were thirty minutes in duration and they were transliterated verbatim. Findings All participants reported having experienced immense grief following the death of a family member. All pointed out that death was a big loss to the whole family and it was important to establish enduring bonds with the deceased. Out of the fifteen participants, ten interviewees pointed out that they hadn’t previously experienced the loss of a family member and therefore did not originally have the coping skills essential to respond to loss of their beloved ones. For these participants, comprehending the loss and questioning which death took place became significant. Telling a story about the circumstances surrounding the death of a loved one was of great significance to all the people interviewed. Karim, a thirty seven year old man pointed out that the death of his brother left him with a sense of loss. Out of the fifteen participants, twelve of them had an explicit or implicit knowledge of being the primary keeper of memory within the families for the departed relative. Kahalifa, 26, stated that she was possibly the one who was least willing to let her late mother to be forgotten. In the group, seven participants indicated that they performed rituals to remember their dead relatives. Naila, 48 captured the significance of rituals along with their survival. She said that thirty six years later, and every year for her sister Munira birthday, she has white carnation and one single rose. The six carnations are for people who lived with Munira and remembered her while the red rose signifies her red lips. Nevertheless, ritual activity, at time, has a hurting effect. Six participants reported engaging in fantasies on or in dialogue with the departed family member as a scheme of coping and staying emotionally connected with the dead person. Participants utilized phrases like closeness, connecting and feeling the presence of the departed member. Kahalif, a 35 years old man said that there were nights he would lay in bed and outwardly talk to his dead wife. He would wish that she was still around and felt that his dead wife was still a portion of their lives. A name of the dead person attributed memory and identity, as was reflected via the narration of loss by all the people interviewed. The name of the dead person seemed to offer a personal connection or bond, enhancing the lost member’s psychological presence, persona and his or her significance to be highly concretized. Analysis From the study, all participants pointed out that the death of a family member was a loss to the whole family. Several participants in the research indicated how death of a family member made them to reorganize and construct continuing dialogued with the departed family member, at times for the reason of not just dialoguing with but at times for consolation during the challenging and difficult situations of one’s life. Continuing connections or bonds with a significant beloved one offers a secure haven during periods of threat as well as a safe base for exploring the world. In case of participants in this research, the safety and bond is with a representational projection or inner projection of accepting the departed relative. The idea of continuing connections with the deceased family member possibly might be more simply traced in the collective personas’ experiences. Family members feel that keeping of memory as essential to the remembrance and connection with the departed. As indicated in the literature rituals help family members to cope with loss. Rituals like visiting the gravesite and placement of flowers is important in remembering the deceased. Commemorative deeds result to maintenance of spiritual presence of the dead member and performance of rituals by the living members is a way of connecting with the deceased. Just as rite is a significant part of remembrance of the deceased family member a continuing live connection is equally important in coping with sense of loss. Most of participants suggested a continuing relationship with their dead relative. Living family members in UAE carry usually carry the memories of the deceased members with the deceased member becoming a fellow traveler. Even though the idea of continuing bonds or connections do not carry any inherent suggestion of unhealthy versus healthy reaction to grief, it refers to the actuality that several individuals continues to bond with a deceased individual and this bonding might assist in coping with loss. Remembering a dead family member along with the circumstance in which the person died is somehow a scheme of keeping the deceased alive. If a person is not remembered, it means that they have truly disappeared from the lives of the living family members. Conclusion Emirati families cope with death of a family member through reorganizing the family system and trying to establish an enduring bond with the dead person. From the study, surviving family members often experienced a continuing emotional attachment with the deceased member therefore demonstrating continuing bonds. Family members recognize that the death of a family member significantly alters their lives and thus have to reorganize and create enduring bonds with the deceased to ensure that the departed member is still a part of the family. References Field, P. (2010). Unresolved grief and continuing bonds: An attachment perspective .Death Studies, 30, 739–756. Giles, J., & Neimeyer, A. (2009). Loss, grief, and the search for significance: Toward a model of meaning reconstruction in bereavement. Journal of Constructivist Psychology, 19, 31–65 Murray, I. (2012). "Coping with Death, Dying, and Grief in Families." In Families and Change: Coping with Stressful Events and Transitions, ed. C. McKenry and S. Price. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage. Walsh, F., & McGoldrick, M. (2010). "Loss and the Family: A Systemic Perspective." In Living Beyond Loss: Death in the Family, ed. F. Walsh and M. McGoldrick. New York: Norton. Bowlby-West, L. (2000). The impact of death on the family system. Journal of Family Therapy, 5, 279-294. Read More