Basic Personal Counselling - Essay Example

Name: Course: College: Tutor: Date: Reflective Journals Separate One Reflective Journal for Each Day Day 1 Counseling is one of the subjects that I find very interesting. This is because of the various topics we have to cover concerning the lives of human beings and their behaviors in the society on a daily basis. On our first day of learning, we had an opportunity to learn various issues about counseling. We began by defining what counseling is in general. In the definition that we were provided with, I think counseling is a progression whereby one is helped to reach a condition of wellbeing. I also feel any person can be able to become a counselor through special training in human psychology (McLeod, 2009). Counseling skills are necessary in people’s daily lives. For example, as a teacher I need to guide my students on the careers that they need to pursue according to the strengths that are revealed in their performance, help them to understand who to associate themselves with and so on. Therefore, I believe I need these skills as a teacher for me to be effective in my work when dealing with students. Similarly, having an understanding of how students behave can make me to be better placed to handle challenges that arise on a daily basis in students’ life (Campbell, 2004). I also believe that one needs special skills to be able to act as a counselor. These skills have varying importance in the application of counseling. However, they remain core and must be learnt by every person who desires to be a counselor. One of the most important skills that are important in counseling as I came to understand is active listening. I believe this skill plays and important role in any counseling session since it is by active listening that a counselor is able to get down to the really issue that the client may be going through. For example, listening attentively when a client narrates the whole ordeal in her life, and asking for clarification where she is not clear can easily help me as a counselor to advise her on what to do to solve her problem (Geldard & Patton, 2007). I also came to understand that there is a difference between counseling and therapy. I think counseling addresses issues that emanates from the external world of a person whereas therapy addresses the issues that are as a result of the internal environment of a person. The way one manages time, people, events and other issues that are external in a person’s life fall under counseling. On the other hand, I suppose therapy is associated with emotional, psychological and the spiritual wellbeing of a person. For example, the emotional patterns of a person, how one feels from the inside can really affect how he relates to other people and to himself. Therefore, I believe therapy addresses such issues in a person’s life. Therefore, counselor helps the client to manage the external environment well while a therapist guides the client on how to ensure that his emotional, psychological and spiritual is well maintained (Hoving et al., 2006, p.370-375). Day 2 On the second day of my learning of counseling, we got into a deeper analysis of some of the vital details that a person needs to understand in order to become an excellent counselor. On this day, I learnt about human behavior. My lesson began with the introduction to sociological theories which can be defined as the theoretical frameworks that have been developed to describe the behaviors of people within a particular environment or in a certain school of thought. For example, I believe a social theory can be developed to expound on the behavior of students in school or people in the general society (Egan, 2007). There are various theories that I believe are important in counseling. One of these theories is the behavior theory. I suppose behavior theory is mostly used in schools and it allows students to learn on various skills that will be critical to their integration into the society later on when they are grown ups. I believe that when applied in teaching, behavioral theories support a number of learning approaches. Therefore, I consider them to be vital both to the teacher and the students in their lessons (Johnston & White, 2003, p.63-68). Another theory that I have come across that is important is the cognitive theory. I understand that this theory tries to define the behavior of human beings through an analysis of their thought processes. I know human beings to be very unique in their behavior. This uniqueness has been attributed to the thought processes that takes place in their minds and thus affect the way they respond to different situations. Therefore, I think cognitive theory plays a significant role in counseling since understanding the thought processes of a person can go a long way in helping such a person attain a state of well being. Of most importance in this theory is that people make decisions based on certain assumptions without which, they will not be in position to reason properly. (Marziano et al., 2006, p.97-104). I also came across the Gestalt therapy. I found out that this is a phenomelogical-existential therapy that dates back in the 1940s. It was founded by Laura Perls and Fredrick (Fritz). This therapeutic technique focuses on the feelings of the patient with an aim of bringing them to a realization of the effects of their actions. I found out that the main strategy in this technique which is its main strength is helping the patient to understand on his own areas in his life that he can be able to change. On the other hand, its weakness lies in the fact that some patients are so unconscious about their lives and may not be able to really understand the areas in that need change. Therefore, the therapy may end up missing the mark in what it intends to achieve (Sean, 2007, p.11-16). From the lessons on the second day, I think cognitive theory is of paramount importance to my work as a counselor. This is because it provides an overview of how the thought processes in a person function, a phenomenon that is important when helping a person to resolve his problems. Similarly, I realized that it is important for counselor to use open ended questions so that they can be able to draw a particular piece of information that can help them during the counseling sessions. I have come to understand that opened ended questions are very important as they keep the client talking unlike closed ended questions that makes the client to give a straight answer that may not necessarily help the counselor to get to the root of the problem that one has. I therefore believe such questions are important to help the client to open up, an issue that aids in finding solution to their problems. For example, when a man complains that his wife is giving him problems, open ended questions will help the counselor to determine whether it is the man that has a problem or his wife. Again from here, it is easy to make the man understand his fault if he is the one that has a problem. Another approach to counseling that I came across is No Bullshit approach. I understand that this is an approach whereby as a counselor you have to understand that some people don’t love counseling and therefore won’t like to seek help when they need it in their lives. I understand that the no bullshit approach requires that the client must be honest and direct in his session with the counselor. I think this is an excellent approach when dealing with clients who do not know what they want. On the other hand, I believe it can be such a challenging approach to be used by counselors because some clients may fail to be honest. Day 3 On the third day of our lesson dwelled much on conflicts and mediations. One of the issues that I came across was the ways that can be used to respond to conflicts. On reflecting on this matter, it came to my mind that it was necessary for one to have a wider knowledge about how people behave to be in a position to respond to various conflicts that arise among them. For example, an understanding of the cultural background and beliefs can aid in determining how such a person can act when subjected to certain conditions in his life. My perceptions towards conflicts changed completely, from a belief that conflicts must not be depicted in any form in a person’s life because I thought they were evil. However, after the lessons on this day, I believe that conflicts are normal in people’s lives (Reynolds & Aletraris, 2007, p.752-757). I think conflicts, disputes and mediation go hand in hand and they cannot be separated. Therefore, apart from getting an overview of conflicts, I also had an opportunity to study mediations and different skills that can be used in mediations. I suppose mediation is a process involved in solving conflicts between two or more parties that have found themselves at a place of conflicts. The process involves bringing these parties on a neutral ground and helping them to make some compromise so that dialogue can take the centre stage in between or among them. On the other hand, there needs to be a neutral person who has no interest in the issue of contention for such dialogue to take place. Such a person is referred to as the mediator. For example, when two of my students quarrel, I can bring them together and act as a middle person to reconcile them again (Burke et al. 2007). I realised that as a counsellor, I can also act as a mediator. There are specific skills that I have to posses to be an excellent mediator in my work. Some of these skills include understanding cross cultural norms and way of life. This is because the family background of a person plays a vital role in coordinating his behaviour. For example, when counselling a person who has a negative perception towards women, it is important to understand whether the cultural background of this person acknowledges women or not. On the other hand, I realise that I have to minimise the use of non verbal communication because it carries different meaning connotation in different societies. For example, I was recently called to help in solving a conflict between an American girl and his African boyfriend. Therefore, while talking to him, I patted him on the back. To him, he interpreted this as a sexual move and ended up accusing his girlfriend later of forcing him on anther girl. When I head this, I was hurt. However, I have learnt that different cultures use different non-verbal and if I was called today to handle that situation, I won’t use non-verbal communication. Other skills that are needed are leadership skills. One needs to be aware of the power that has been vested in him to deal with the subject that is tackled during the mediation process (Muscara, Catroppa & Anderson, 2008, p.445-450). Finally, I think it is also important to be aware of the challenges that a person may have in his life that may affect him psychologically. One of these challenges is the Acquired Brain Injury, ABI. I know that ABI is a problem that occurs when one’s brain is injured when he is young thus affecting some processes in his life. However, I believe this person can be given help to enable him to live a normal life in the society. To me as a counsellor, this is a problem that can be tackled using the psychotherapy skills that counsellors have. On the other hand, it is important to understand that despite the cognitive skills and other learning tools that are necessary in a person’s life having been affected, this does not mean that such a person has intellectual disability. I believe such a person, when given proper counselling, can be able to rebuild some learning tools in his life, leading to a person who is normal and thus able to learn like any other person in the society. References Burke et al. (2007). Moderators and mediators of behaviour change in a lifestyle program for treated hypertensives: a randomized controlled trial (ADAPT). Health Education Research, doi:10.1093/her/cym047. Campbell, M.A. (2004). Value of Sandplay as a Therapeutic Tool for School Guidance Counsellors. 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Identification of five fundamental implicit theories underlying cognitive distortions in child abusers: A preliminary study. Psychology, Crime and Law, (12)1, 97-105. McLeod, J. (2009). An introduction to counselling. New York, USA: Open University Press. Muscara, F., Catroppa, C., Anderson, V. (2008). Social problem-solving skills as a mediator between executive function and long-term social outcome following paediatric traumatic brain injury. Journal of Neuropsychology, 2(2), 445-461(17). Reynolds, J. & Aletraris, L. (2007). Work–Family Conflict, Children, and Hour Mismatches in Australia. Journal of Family Issues, 28(6), 749-772. Sean, G. (2007). Besides the Hot Seat. Gestalt in Organisations: Perspectives and Applications. Gestalt Journal of Australia and New Zealand, 4(1), 10-35. Read More